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Adda B Say So: Remember Remember

By Fatima Zahra Umar There are few things more heart wrenching than watching the man you married put his hands on you, on your neck. It is absolutely the worst. When he tightens his hands around your neck expelling the oxygen from your lungs as he squeezes harder and harder… When you factor in the yelling and the threats to ...

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COMMONSENSE 101:STUFF WE NEED TO STOP SAYING

By Samirah Abdu Guye So some time ago, I was lurking on Facebook as usual, putting my beak into other people’s businesses……. Then, (cue in Indian music for when something bad is about to happen), I came across a post shared by some peeps on my timeline. It was written by an accomplished Northern woman who I have always (and ...

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Divorce Diaries Season 4 Eps 8

MY NAME IS RAMATU FAGGE. I AM 45 YEARS OLD. I AM FROM BAUCHI STATE. I WAS MARRIED TO MALLAM GARBA ABUBAKAR. I AM MOTHER TO FIVE BEAUTIFUL CHILDREN; I WOULD LIKE TO SHARE MY DIVORCE DIARIES WITH YOU. I met Garba when I was a young impressionable and naïve 19 year old. For him, it was love at first ...

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GIRLS TO WOMEN IN NORTHERN NIGERIA

  By Balkisu Muhammad. Growing up as a girl in Northern Nigerian society is very different from any other society. The Northern Nigerian society as we all know is very conservative in nature. As a girl you are also expected to be conservative and reserved in everything you do. In your dressing, your interactions with others, you are not allowed ...

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Divorce Diaries Season 4 Eps 7

MY NAME IS MAIMUNA ALHAJI. I AM 56 YEARS OLD. I WAS MARRIED TO ALHAJI KABIR, A PROMINENT MAN IN OUR STATE AND NATIONAL POLITICS. I WOULD LIKE TO SHARE MY DIVORCE DIARIES WITH YOU. I met Alhaji when he was a slim eager young man. He was a young hotheaded firebrand student union leader at Ahmadu Bello University, during ...

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Divorce Diaries Season 4 Eps 6

MY NAME IS LAWAL JALO. I AM 58 YEARS OLD. I AM A BUSINESS EXECUTIVE. I WOULD LIKE TO SHARE MY DIVORCE DIARIES WITH YOU. I was married to my wife Halima for more than two decades years before our union crashed. No one could have predicted that our marriage would become what it became. In the beginning it seemed ...

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Ask Yourself This Before Getting Mad At Him

I have news for you; even the most docile, sweet and patient friend in your group (the one who never fights with her boyfriend in public) gets mad sometimes. The reason she seems calmer and cooler than the rest of you though, and the reason she has less relationship fights to vent about is because she asks herself a series ...

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Divorce Diaries Season 4 Eps 5

MY NAME IS SARATU ALHAJI. I AM FROM ZAMFARA STATE. I WOULD LIKE TO SHARE MY DIVORCE DIARIES WITH YOU. I met my husband Faruk on Facebook. We had mutual friends and Facebook had suggested that I send him a friend request. I thought he looked handsome and cool on his profile picture and so I sent him one. I ...

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On Plight Of Divorced Muslim Women

Last week, we did a lament on the plight of pensioners. Having seen that, someone who introduced herself as Mairo Mamman (queenaminazazzau@gmail.com) emailed me another lament titled “MANUAL FOR NEWLY DIVORCED WOMEN IN NORTHERN NIGERIA”. Though the writer does not say whether she too is a victim, and does not discuss the sociology leading to the divorce and the immediate ...

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Teaching my mother how to raise her daughter

By Samira Sanusi The women before us must understand and accept that we’ll always be our mother’s daughters even when we dare to opt out of the unspoken rule of carrying their pain. A 21st century woman is NOT weak, disloyal, unfaithful to God and disrespectful to you for choosing to unload the pain suffered by generations of women before ...

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