Teaching my mother how to raise her daughter
By Samira Sanusi
The women before us must understand and accept that we’ll always be our mother’s daughters even when we dare to opt out of the unspoken rule of carrying their pain.
A 21st century woman is NOT weak, disloyal, unfaithful to God and disrespectful to you for choosing to unload the pain suffered by generations of women before her.
A 21st century woman admires and respects the stories told with wet eyes, cracked voice, sad gaze, deep sighs, cold shudders and smiley-face stickers on the lips. She listens, absorbs, learns, and hopes to find the strength, bravery, courage, perseverance, patience, hard work, faith and dignity running through her own veins.
She also begs to be all that and more, with a little of help, with the right to be, to feel, to break, to fall, to speak about the pain, to ask for help. A 21st century woman is not trying to embarrass or let down a generation of phenomenal women who did it all, she’s trying to show you that there’s another way, a better way. That some things mustn’t be endured and suffered in silence, that her voice is powerful and must be heard, that this battle fought by those before her will still hurt her regardless, that just because you did it all alone, doesn’t mean she has to.
Women like me are begging women like you to hold our hand and walk with us some days, send us to the prayer rooms some nights, and most importantly, understand that it is okay not to be okay, it doesn’t mean we’ll fail you.
Samira Haruna Sanusi
President, Samira Sanusi Sickle Cell Foundation